Monday, March 24, 2014

A Raw Realization

Miller is 2 going on 18 at times. He is strong spirited, extroverted and at times more than I can handle. He's like a thoroughbred horse that needs a bridle. Lately he has turned into a little warrior. 
By warrior I mean he is out to conquer the world. He's up to any challenge and would "hunt" all day if we would let him. 

Yesterday, I was in the kitchen and broke a glass bowl. Glass went everywhere. Lee grabbed the broom and began sweeping the glass. Miller heard the commotion and took his perch on the back of the couch that overlooks the kitchen. Lee swept and out of the broom slithered a SNAKE! Yes! Right across our kitchen floor slithered a small, yucky snake! Of course I screamed! Lee quickly smashed the broom on it catching it, but not killing it. Lee began giving me orders on how to assist with killing the snake. After my task was completed I quickly perched on the couch with Miller to watch the rest unfold. Lee managed to get the snake outside into the garage and killed it. 
Lee came back in and made a reference to getting satan out of our house! :) I was completely terrified! 

About 15 minutes later I was in my bathroom getting ready for small group and Miller walked in there. He said "Mama, you stand right there where I can see you! I'm gonna go kill dat snake!" 

My flesh wanted to scream... "No, baby! Don't you ever get near a snake!" 

But I refrained. I knelt down and told him that one day he would kill snakes like his daddy and protect his family. For now, stay on the couch with me. He went on pretending to be daddy. 

There is part of me that wants to be all my children need. I want Miller to stay perched on the couch with me forever. I want to protect him and keep him right beside me forever. However, the raw reality is constantly before me. I was only "all he needed" for a few short weeks/months of his life. Now, with each passing day I am releasing him into the world. My tiny tot will one day be a man. 
(Insert sobby mama tears)

Yesterday, I thought to myself. I am the "stand in bride." There are times when my role as mom is to let him "practice" protecting and leading his family. 

We recently attended my friend's daughter's one year old birthday party. I watched the one year old's parents love on her, take pictures with her and sing happy birthday to their quickly growing daughter. They love her with all their might. One day they will entrust her to a husband who they expect to love and protect her. 
A sober reality and heavy weight came upon me in that moment: I am raising men who will be husbands to these precious daughters one day. 

Moms and dads of our future daughter-in-laws: We are trying! We are trying hard to raise men who can physically and spiritually kill snakes that enter their home. We are trying hard to raise warriors for Christ. I am trying to be a mom who slowly, but surely teaches my son to get off the couch and fight, as I (unnaturally) remain perched, watching it unfold. 

Pray for your sons. It is no easy task to be a spiritual and physical leader/protector of the household. Although my 2 year old seems thrilled about the task at hand :) 

Oh and if you have suggestions about literally keeping snakes away, please feel free to inform us! 

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